I was stingy.
I was stingy with the sticky stuff. Claire and I put up a wall of pictures and I was stingy. Now it seems half the wall has fallen down.
I am vulnerable.
Whenever I get to this point in how much I like, I become too vulnerable. I need to remove myself, look outside myself, be objective. I repeat the names over and over in my mind, a broken record of sorts. ___, ___, ___, ___. Hurt, hurt, hurt, hurt. Not again. Thinking about how much this will hurt, how much more this one will hurt, makes me want to stop now. ___,___,___,___... they weren't the same. They didn't tell me things that made me feel good. Giddiness? How long has it been since that was last expressed on my face. Their initiative wasn't always there. It wasn't so easy. Where have I heard this before? "___." I need not worry. Yet, I worry.
I am not sad.
I am scared.
This is not a related picture... but awesome nonetheless.
2 comments:
You're letting us in a little. Thanks for that.
Everything will be okay. I am here for you and you are here for me.
Let's put that wall back together tonight. I feel that it may therapeutic.
I'm also glad for the letting-in.
I love you.
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